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Lifestyle

Ask Amy: It’s tough to be young and sober at the clubs

Dear Amy: I recently turned 21. I will be the first in my group of friends to graduate from college. This happens in a few weeks.It feels like life is starting to return to a sense of normalcy as the pandemic recedes, and my friends and I are socializing more outside of our homes – going out dancing, and enjoying the nightlife.AdvertisementMy best friend and I are not big drinkers and every time we go out men pressure us to drink and then try to shame us for not “knowing how to party.”Can you help us come up with a witty comeback to shut down the pressure to drink?Advertisement– Happy TeetotalerDear Happy: Alcohol is the only drug I can think of where people are continuously asked to explain why they are NOT using it. Understand, however, that you are a part of a growing community of people who are choosing to live sober.Much as I enjoy offering snappy comebacks, I think the most important thing for you to do is to completely own your sobriety.The only good thing about being shamed for “not knowing how to party” is that it offers you a very quick insight into the people who do this (women also pressure people to drink).People who pressure you to party are throwing down red flags, and you should take this as your cue to avoid them.You’re starting to venture out now for your first time as a legal adult, and so you should take some basics to heart:Never accept a drink from anyone other than directly from your trusted companion or from the bartender.Your professional bartender is your friend here. State that you aren’t drinking alcohol and ask for suggestions of a good substitute. A seasoned bartender will give you alternatives and also take this as a cue to keep an eye on you. If you ever feel threatened or even uncomfortable, let the bartender and/or club security know.Advertisement(No matter what you’re drinking, tip the bar staff well.)Regarding explaining your sobriety, it would be easy for you to lie:“I’m celebrating ‘Dry July.’”“I’m running a marathon tomorrow.”“Shhhhhh – I’m pregnant.”“One more DUI and I’m in the slammer.”Advertisement“I need to stay sober so I won’t slip in your vomit later.”But owning your sobriety looks something like this: “I don’t drink because I don’t want to. Thank you for respecting my choice.”Dear Amy: My sister retired recently and moved away from her family and to the Southwest.She purchased a small home in a 55-and-older community and seems very happy. She stated that it was the only place she found that she could afford, relying solely on her Social Security and some savings.Thirty years ago, she divorced and apparently in the divorce decree her husband was ordered to invest a sum of money, on her behalf, to be given to her when her ex-husband retired.Her ex has been retired now for over five years and her ex and her kids are reluctant to give her the money because they are afraid she will just spend it.AdvertisementI really believe she has forgotten about this nest egg over the years.She could really use the money and if she spends it and enjoys herself, good for her.I am going out to see her in a few weeks and I’m wondering: should I bring this up to her, or should I leave it alone and let her family decide when the time is right to give her what’s overdue?– Wondering SiblingDear Sibling: I’m wondering how you and her kids know about your sister’s nest egg when she doesn’t, but yes – I think you should bring this up.Her other family members will likely accuse you of overstepping, but I agree with you that if your sister has money coming to her, then she should receive it.AdvertisementA divorce decree isn’t a suggestion – it’s a legal agreement.Ask AmyDailyNo-nonsense advice for better living delivered to your inbox every morning. For a limited time, sign up for the Ask Amy newsletter and get the book “Ask Amy: Essential Wisdom from America’s Favorite Advice Columnist” for $5.Dear Amy: Thank you for honing in on the sexism implied by “Upset Grandma” who claimed to be “confused” by the “paternalism” demonstrated by a family naming a son after other male family members.People should have the right to honor previous generations by naming children after them. Male or female: who cares!?– Grateful ReaderDear Grateful: My sense is that “Upset Grandma” was hoping to prod me into a feminist rant regarding male children being named after male ancestors. But she caught me with my rants down.Got a question for Amy? Enter it here and we’ll send it to her.AdvertisementSign up here to receive the Ask Amy newsletter to get advice e-mailed to your inbox every morning, and for a limited time — get the book “Ask Amy: Essential Wisdom from America’s Favorite Advice Columnist” for $5.©2021 Amy Dickinson.

Sports

Chicago Fire’s winless streak reaches 9 games with a 1-0 loss to New York City FC

NEW YORK — Héber Araujo dos Santos scored on a penalty kick in the 28th minute and Sean Johnson made it stand up as New York City FC defeated the Chicago Fire 1-0 on Sunday.NYCFC (7-3-2) at least temporarily moved two points ahead of the Philadelphia Union for the top spot in the Eastern Conference. The Union visited the Portland Timbers on Sunday night. NYCFC began the day in a four-way tie for second with Orlando, Montreal and the New York Red Bulls.AdvertisementJohnson, a former Fire goalkeeper (2010-16), didn’t have to make a save until the 90th minute. Jhon Duran got off the lone shot on goal for the Fire (2-6-5), whose winless streak reached nine games since a 2-0-2 start.NYCFC outshot the Fire 15-10 and had five shots on goal.AdvertisementValentín Castellanos, the defending Golden Boot winner, did not play for NYCFC because of a card-accumulation suspension.

Sports

Justin Thomas wins the PGA Championship in a playoff after leader Mito Pereira double-bogeys the 72nd hole

TULSA, Okla. — Justin Thomas is a major champion again when he least expected it.Thomas matched a PGA Championship record Sunday when he rallied from a seven-shot deficit at Southern Hills, then saved his most exquisite shot-making for a three-hole playoff to defeat Will Zalatoris.AdvertisementHe closed with a 3-under 67, matching the low score of a final round made difficult more by nerves than the wind. He seized control in the playoff with a 3-wood to 35 feet on the 301-yard 17th hole for a two-putt birdie.He tapped in for par at No. 18 for his second major — added to the 2017 PGA Championship at Quail Hollow — and stood erect with a smile, a mixture of joy and disbelief.Advertisement“I was asked early in the week what lead is safe and I said, ‘No lead,’” Thomas said. “I can’t believe I found myself in a playoff.”Thomas needed plenty of help, and Mito Pereira provided it in a tragic finish. The 27-year-old from Chile, playing in only his second major, took a one-shot lead to the final hole and drove into a creek to make double bogey.It was the first time since Phil Mickelson in the 2006 U.S. Open at Winged Foot that a player lost a one-shot lead on the final hole to lose a major.Zalatoris looked like he had thrown away his chances for a first major — and first PGA Tour victory — when he three-putted from just outside 20 feet on the 16th hole. But he responded with a birdie from the bunker at the 17th and holed an 8-foot par putt on the 18th for a 71.He joined Thomas at 5-under 275, and they played on when Pereira faltered.Justin Thomas poses with the Wanamaker Trophy with his dad, Mike, after winning the PGA Championship in a playoff against Will Zalatoris at Southern Hills Country Club on Sunday, May 22, 2022, in Tulsa, Okla. (Sue Ogrocki/AP)Thomas, who had gone 14 months since his last victory at The Players Championship, now has a PGA Tour victory in each of his last eight years and moves to No. 5 in the world.John Mahaffey in the 1978 PGA Championship at Oakmont was the other player to come from seven shots behind on the final day. He also won in a playoff over Tom Watson and Jerry Pate.Thomas was still seven shots behind when he made his remarkable run, a mixture of key birdies and keeping mistakes off his card. It started with a 65-foot birdie putt from just short of the green to a back pin on the par-3 11th. He edged closer with an 18-foot birdie on the next hole.AdvertisementHe was lurking, while the leading pack behind him was leaking oil.Zalatoris and Cameron Young each caught Pereira, ever so briefly. All of them found trouble in the rough and in the sand. Thomas nearly holed a long bunker shot on the 16th, made birdie from a left bunker on the reachable 17th and had a 10-foot birdie putt he thought he needed at the end.He missed — but got a reprieve.Pereira was on the cusp of becoming Chile’s first major champion and giving South America the career Grand Slam.Even after five bogeys, he never lost the lead and delivered clutch par saves from the bunker left of the ninth green and from well behind the 10th green. None was bigger than his 12-foot putt on the 16th to stay one shot ahead.It all came undone with one swing.AdvertisementHis sawed-off swing with the driver, so effective on the previous hole, peeled to the right and into the creek down the right side of the 18th fairway. After a penalty drop, his approach up the hill started left and never cut back, landing in the rough. His chip rolled off the back edge of the green.Mito Pereira leaves the 18th green after his final round of the PGA Championship at Southern Hills Country Club on Sunday, May 22, 2022, in Tulsa, Okla. (Matt York/AP)His double bogey gave him a 75, a hard-luck end to such a promising week.“On Monday, I just wanted to make the cut. On Sunday, I wanted to win,” Pereira said. “I’ll take this to learn for the future.”Young, whose father is a longtime PGA professional, also will look back at missed chances. Playing with Zalatoris, a former roommate at Wake Forest, Young was in the mix all day and was briefly tied for the lead. His hopes ended on the 16th went he found a bunker right of the green, blasted out weakly to 30 feet and three-putted for a double bogey. He closed with a 71.Matt Fitzpatrick of England, who played in the final group with Pereira, also stayed in range, two shots behind until his sloppy bogey on the 17th. He shot 73 and tied for fifth with Tommy Fleetwood (67) and Chris Kirk (68).Rory McIlroy made a brief run with four straight birdies on the front nine, putting him at 4 under for the tournament. He was 2 over the rest of the way and finished eighth.AdvertisementIn eight majors at Southern Hills, it was the first time a player rallied from any margin to win, and it was only the second playoff. Retief Goosen won the other in the 2001 U.S. Open after he three-putted from 12 feet on the final hole. At least he got another chance, unlike Pereira.Six of the seven previous major champions at Southern Hills are in the World Golf Hall of Fame. The 29-year-old Thomas, now with two majors among his 15 career PGA Tour victories, is surely headed there one day.

Sports

AJ Pollock’s homer in the 9th helps the Chicago White Sox beat the New York Yankees 3-1 in Game 1 of a doubleheader

NEW YORK — Johnny Cueto was terrific in his Chicago White Sox debut last Monday in Kansas City.He was even more impressive in his second start of the season Sunday against the New York Yankees.AdvertisementThe veteran right-hander allowed six hits in six-plus scoreless innings at Yankee Stadium but did not factor in the decision. The Sox gave up a late lead only to respond with two in the ninth for a 3-1 victory in Game 1 of a doubleheader.“He’s an artist,” Sox manager Tony La Russa said. “It’s fun to watch him pitch a game. And that’s what he’s been, an outstanding starting pitcher, because he gives you a different look four times in a game.”AdvertisementAJ Pollock put the Sox ahead in the ninth with a leadoff homer to left on a 1-0 fastball from Yankees reliever Aroldis Chapman.“You’ve got to stay short to him,” Pollock said. “He’s got some good velocity, good cut on his fastball, so just trying to hit a line drive and it worked out.”Andrew Vaughn drew a one-out walk, moved to second on a wild pitch and to third on a passed ball before scoring on a double by Adam Engel, making it 3-1. Liam Hendriks struck out two in a perfect ninth for his 13th save.It was a nice bounce-back performance by the Sox after the Yankees tied the score at 1 in the eighth when Aaron Judge homered to left on an 0-2 sinker against reliever Kendall Graveman.The Yankees put two on with one out in the inning, but Graveman rebounded to get Josh Donaldson to fly out to center and Aaron Hicks to pop out to third.“Most times when you do that, (you) lose your concentration and there is another run on the board,” La Russa said of Graveman. “He got the zero afterward, gave us a chance to win.”Cueto put the Sox in an excellent position early.“I had good command of all my pitches today and they had very good movement and I was able to locate them up and down the zone,” Cueto, who was receiving fluids in the aftermath of Game 1, said in a statement. “That was the key to keep the Yankees off-balanced today.”AdvertisementThe Sox went ahead 1-0 on an RBI single by Yasmani Grandal in the fourth.And Cueto kept “dealing,” as Pollock said. He struck out five and walked two in the 95-pitch outing.“He’s been awesome for us,” Pollock said. “Works fast and has all sorts of pitches to get them off-balanced. Shimmy shake (delivery). It’s awesome to play behind him. It’s great having him out there for the first game of a doubleheader because of the tone he just set for us.”Cueto has pitched 12 scoreless innings, the third-longest streak for a Sox starter at the beginning of his tenure with the team since 1974, according to STATS. Ken Brett pitched 17 scoreless innings in 1976 and Jack McDowell went 13 innings in 1987.Cueto allowed two hits and struck out seven in six scoreless innings against the Royals.“When (general manager) Rick (Hahn) mentioned that we were going to be able to bring him into the organization, he has a special relationship with our pitching coach (Ethan Katz) because they were in San Francisco together (in 2020),” La Russa said. “Ethan was watching the videos (before Cueto’s arrival from Triple-A Charlotte) and said, ‘Man, he’s throwing free and easy. That’s vintage stuff.’”AdvertisementCueto exited after allowing two singles to begin the seventh. Joe Kelly struck out Marwin Gonzalez, picked off Hicks at second and struck out Jose Trevino to maintain the one-run lead.“Kelly was just perfect,” La Russa said.The Yankees got the run in the eighth, but Pollock came though with the big hit in the ninth to give the Sox what La Russa called a “hard-earned” victory.