Column: As the Chicago White Sox slog through an angst-ridden season, Dr. Ozzie brings some needed levity

The most interesting new TV character of the 2022 season is Dr. Ozzie, the pseudo-psychologist whose job is to talk a die-hard Chicago White Sox fan off the ledge during this anxiety-ridden season.

Ozzie Guillen plays the designated shrink, while Chuck Garfien, his cohost on the Sox pregame and postgame shows on NBC Sports Chicago, lies on a couch and plays himself.

I’m not sure how the players or manager Tony La Russa feel about NBC Sports Chicago’s decision to have a little fun at their expense. But if the Sox were playing up to their abilities, there would be no reason for a comedic bit on the struggles that have turned their fans inside out.

Baseball is entertainment after all. We all deserve a laugh. If the Sox had any sense of humor, they would get La Russa to lie on the couch for an upcoming episode as Dr. Ozzie questions him about the stress he has been under at the office.

I can already picture Dr. Ozzie peering down from his reading glasses and saying, “Are you getting enough sleep, Tony?”

How long the character will last is unknown, but Guillen deserves an Emmy for his performance. No one has played a Chicago psychologist better on TV since Bob Newhart.

Maybe the Sox will go on a prolonged run, take the lead in the American League Central and have the last laugh on everyone, including Dr. Ozzie.

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As crazy as it sounds, it’s possible. They enter Tuesday’s doubleheader in Kansas City trailing the division-leading Minnesota Twins by only two games, and the race no one wants to win could come down to the final days of the season. Six of the Sox’s final nine games are against the Twins, including a season-ending, three-game series at home Oct. 3-5.

But the Sox haven’t been trending in the right direction for quite some time. The current stretch of 19 games against sub-.500 teams hasn’t gone the way they hoped. They’re 7-5 so far against the Colorado Rockies, Oakland Athletics, Royals and Texas Rangers, and they haven’t been more than two games over .500 since they were 6-3 on April 17. Their high point was four games over — a 6-2 record — on April 16.

Thankfully they’ve also avoided long losing streaks since an eight-game skid in late April. They can thank Dylan Cease and Johnny Cueto for that.

It has been one long slog, filled with angst over the batting orders, injuries, baserunning, defense and, of course, La Russa, who has taken the brunt of criticism for the team’s poor play. Some of the criticism is over the top, but it’s nothing he didn’t experience in his first go-around as Sox manager.

Making matters worse, the media keep reminding the Sox they’re in an important stretch of games and have most of their players healthy again. Suggesting this is the turning point has become a running joke the last two months.

“Look, we’re all tired of saying, ‘This is the stretch,’ or, ‘The schedule has turned to this,’ or, ‘The health is at this level,’ or, ‘They had this dramatic win so maybe that’s the turning point,’” general manager Rick Hahn said last week after failing to pull off a trade-deadline deal. “So I’m done buying into any prognostications about this or that is the turning point.”

When it happens, we’ll know. Until then, they’re just another underachieving team that no longer deserves the benefit of the doubt.

One thing the Sox don’t need, contrary to Hahn’s suggestion, is bringing premature swagger back to the dugout. The players who normally are the swaggiest — Tim Anderson, Lance Lynn and Liam Hendricks — haven’t performed well enough on a consistent basis to strut. If they can’t perform without the swagger, the Sox are in more trouble than we know.

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Anderson may be the key to the Sox’s chances of playing in October. He has been in a funk since returning from a groin injury on June 20, hitting .245 with one home run and a .287 on-base percentage in his last 39 games.

He was 0-for-13 with six strikeouts in his last three games against the Rangers before starting his two-game suspension Sunday for making contact with an umpire on July 29. He also doesn’t look like he’s having fun, which is not what you need from someone whose name is synonymous with celebrating.

Anderson is expected to return Tuesday in the second game of the doubleheader at Kauffman Stadium, and maybe the break will be a chance for him to clear his head and get back to being the straw that stirs the mojito. The Sox can’t win without their leader and leadoff man doing his thing.

As we await the start of another important stretch, we can only hope Dr. Ozzie provides some comfort and laughs in these trying times.

It’s the only thing that keeps us from crying.