Author: staff

Lifestyle

Ask Amy: Youthful photos of an ex now upset wife

Dear Amy: Many years ago, I was married to “Annie” for about 10 years. Our divorce was amicable, and since we had no children, we have not had any contact since our divorce.A couple of years after my divorce I met and married “Bea.” We’ve now been married for over 30 years.AdvertisementI have an album of photographs. This album consists of childhood photos, photos of my parents, siblings, and me through high school and college. The album includes three photos of Annie – nothing suggestive or racy – these are just reminders of the good times from my youth.Bea strenuously objects to me keeping the photos of Annie and wants me to destroy them, while I think that they are harmless souvenirs of my life, and that destroying them is an irrational attempt to erase the past.AdvertisementAm I nuts?– CharlieDear Charlie: You sound like a perfectly normal person with a perfectly normal past.I have a knee-jerk and negative reaction to the idea of destroying photos. As we move into an almost thoroughly digital age, these material objects are visceral reminders that we exist in the world, in many splendidly awkward settings and posed alongside people we no longer know. And yet – there we are!At the risk of angering your wife, it would be thoughtful for you to scan or copy these photos and send copies to “Annie.” (Do not post them on social media.) I would think that anyone would enjoy a tangible reminder of their much-younger self.It might help you to lean in toward your wife’s reaction if you understand that behind her anger might be regret that she wasn’t ever young alongside you.Because you two met later, she missed a period sharing your life that might always be a source of some sadness and regret for her.Meet her with affection and understanding for the youthful period you didn’t get to share, but gratitude for the adulthood you’ve been granted together.AdvertisementDear Amy: When I am sad, especially about a situation relating to my boyfriend (but also when I’m just stressed out), I tend to cry.I try to explain to my boyfriend what’s wrong, and he does not comfort me.He doesn’t put his arm around me, he doesn’t say he understands what I’m saying, he just watches and listens from the other side of the room.This makes me feel lonely, sad, and embarrassed. I end up trying to explain again why I’m upset, in a desperate attempt to get comfort. It never works.I talk myself in circles, and he watches, sometimes saying that he’s sorry I’m sad.When he leaves, and I’m by myself, I recover because I’m no longer upset by the lack of comfort. When I’m alone I can make myself feel better.AdvertisementWhat should I do?On several occasions I’ve said, “You should go, I’m sad and it isn’t helping me to feel better to have you watch me cry,” but then he stays anyway.Should I leave the room? I don’t want to act angry, but it’s hard to be physically with someone and yet feel so alone.– Alone TogetherDear Alone Together: The best time to discuss your boyfriend’s reaction to your strong emotions is when you aren’t experiencing such strong emotions.As it is, when the tears are flowing, you are conveying that your boyfriend’s actions have made you cry. He may conclude that if his behavior has made you cry, then he should respond by retreating.AdvertisementTalk about this during a calm moment. Tell him, “When I’m upset, I have a much easier time if you will sit near me, hold my hand, put your arm around me, and comfort me.”You should also ask him how he feels when you are in tears. He may tell you that he feels confused, bewildered, hopeless or manipulated.Obviously, you should also examine what about this relationship is bringing on these storms, and whether experiencing this sort of emotional imbalance is healthy for you.Dear Amy: Your answer to “Upset Dad” was astoundingly, bewilderingly wrong.“Dad” mentions that his brothers are childless, as though this justifies his expectation that they should step in to provide regular free childcare.Ask AmyDailyNo-nonsense advice for better living delivered to your inbox every morning. For a limited time, sign up for the Ask Amy newsletter and get the book “Ask Amy: Essential Wisdom from America’s Favorite Advice Columnist” for $5.Other peoples worlds do not revolve around one’s children!Advertisement– Disappointed in YOUDear Disappointed: “Upset Dad’s” son has special needs. According to his question, his brothers seemed unsure of how to be good uncles to their nephew.He was appealing to his brothers not for childcare, but for connection.Got a question for Amy? Enter it here and we’ll send it to her.Sign up here to receive the Ask Amy newsletter to get advice e-mailed to your inbox every morning, and for a limited time — get the book “Ask Amy: Essential Wisdom from America’s Favorite Advice Columnist” for $5.©2021 Amy Dickinson.

Sports

Christopher Morel continues to be a highlight for the Chicago Cubs, coming up clutch in win vs. Milwaukee Brewers

The suggestion came from the on-deck circle.“Breathe, take your time.”AdvertisementWillson Contreras’ message to rookie Christopher Morel was exactly what he needed in that moment after falling behind 0-2 in the bottom of the 10th inning Wednesday night at Wrigley Field. Morel did as Contreras instructed and focused on maintaining his approach — just put the ball in play.Two pitches later, Morel connected on Milwaukee Brewers reliever Hoby Milner’s low-and-away changeup and lofted it to left field. Morel hit it deep enough to score Jason Heyward from third base for a walk-off sacrifice fly in a 4-3 win.Advertisement“It’s amazing, this moment for me,” Morel said. “We’re working for this moment.”Morel wasn’t fixated on whether he hit the ball far enough for Heyward to score on Brewers left fielder Christian Yelich.“Heyward’s a good runner, so I trust him in this moment,” Morel said with a laugh.Morel continues to be a highlight in an otherwise underwhelming start to the season for the Cubs. He extended his franchise record career-opening on-base streak to 15 games with a walk in the first inning.“He’s been coming through for us for a while now in a lot of different ways,” manager David Ross said. “He’s one of those guys you just can’t wait until he gets back up. The top of the lineup turns over and he’s that spark.”Morel’s stolen base at third during the inning resulted in the Cubs’ first run, his aggressiveness forcing Milwaukee catcher Omar Narvaez to throw the ball away on the play. The Cubs’ 12 consecutive games with at least one stolen base is the team’s longest such stretch since recording a stolen base in 14 straight in 1986, according to team historian Ed Hartig. Morel has stolen six bases in his last 13 games.Morel’s infectious energy has been a constant since his call up last month.Chicago Tribune SportsWeekdaysA daily sports newsletter delivered to your inbox for your morning commute.“I love baseball,” Morel said. “God gives me these moments, so I need to give everything every time I go on the field. … I give everything to my team.”AdvertisementWhile plays like Morel’s steal paid off, the Cubs’ aggressiveness on the bases nearly cost them in the victory. They committed three outs on the bases: Contreras was thrown out trying to take an extra base at third to end the fifth, Ian Happ was caught stealing at third and Nico Hoerner was picked off at first base in the ninth, forcing extra innings.“They’re going to have some days like that,” Ross said. “You’re going to have to take some risk and push the envelope. … Any little place we can take advantage of is going to pay huge dividends.“I love the risk we’re taking in the moments we’re taking them and we’ll continue to learn from the mistakes in the areas where we need to improve.”The bullpen gave the Cubs a shot at pulling out the win. Five relievers combined to throw five scoreless innings while allowing only two hits, one walk and 10 strikeouts. Mark Leiter Jr. stranded the Brewers’ automatic runner at third base following a wild pitch. He earned his first big-league win since 2017.Kyle Hendricks went five innings and surrendered three runs.“It’s infectious when you have a guy that brings positive energy, a smile on his face every single day,” Hendricks said of Morel. “It permeates to everyone in that clubhouse. Everyone picks up and feeds off his energy.”

Sports

Chicago White Sox lose for the 5th time in their last 7 games, falling 7-3 to the Toronto Blue Jays

TORONTO — Vladimir Guerrero Jr. hit a two-run homer, Danny Jansen added a three-run blast and the Toronto Blue Jays extended their winning streak to seven games by beating the Chicago White Sox 7-3 on Wednesday night.It’s Toronto’s longest winning streak since an eight-game run last Sept. 1-9.AdvertisementSantiago Espinal added a solo shot as the Blue Jays won for the 11th time in 14 games.Blue Jays left-hander Hyun Jin Ryu left after four innings because of tightness in his forearm. Ryu missed 24 games in April and May because of soreness in his forearm. Ryu left his previous start, May 26 against the Los Angeles Angels, after five innings because of a sore elbow. AdvertisementRyu allowed three runs, two earned, and four hits. He walked none and struck out four in the victory over the Sox.Ross Stripling (1-1) replaced Ryu and worked 2⅔ scoreless innings. David Phelps pitched 1⅓ innings and Yimi Garcia finished.José Abreu hit a two-run home run and AJ Pollock added a solo blast, but the White Sox lost for the fifth time in seven games.Back in the lineup after sitting out Tuesday because of a non-COVID illness, Pollock homered on Ryu’s third pitch of the game. It was Pollock’s third homer of the season and the fifth leadoff blast of his career.Espinal replied with a leadoff homer in the bottom of the first, snapping White Sox right-hander Michael Kopech’s 42-inning homerless streak to start the season.Espinal has a career-high three home runs this season. The leadoff homer was the first of his career.Blue Jays shortstop Bo Bichette drew a bases-loaded walk in the second but Kopech struck out Guerrero on a 98 mph fastball to leave the bases full.Jansen’s homer, his seventh, was a two-out drive that came on an 0-2 fastball in the third.AdvertisementGuerrero added some breathing room with a two-out blast off Bennett Sousa in the eighth, his 10th.Pitching on nine days rest after starting the second game of a doubleheader against the New York Yankees on May 22, Kopech (1-2) allowed five runs and six hits in a season-low three innings.Kopech walked four, struck out four and threw 85 pitches, 46 strikes. His ERA rose from 1.29 to 2.20.

Sports

Marion Barber III, former Dallas Cowboys and Chicago Bears running back, dies at 38

FRISCO, Texas — Marion Barber III, the former Dallas Cowboys running back who scored plenty of touchdowns without recording a 1,000-yard season, has died, the team said Wednesday. He was 38.Barber played a final season with Chicago in 2011 after spending his first six years with the Cowboys. He had issues with mental health after his career.AdvertisementPolice in the Dallas suburb of Frisco said Wednesday they made a welfare check at an apartment “believed to be leased” by Barber and were investigating an unattended death there.The Cowboys, who have their headquarters in Frisco, said they were “heartbroken by the tragic death of Marion Barber III.”Advertisement“Marion was an old-school, hard-nosed football player who ran with the will to win every down,” the team said. “He had a passion for the game and love for his coaches and teammates.”Chicago Bears running back Marion Barber III carries the ball in the first quarter as the Seattle Seahawks’ Leroy Hill tries to bring him down, Dec. 18, 2011, at Soldier Field. (Scott Strazzante, Chicago Tribune)Barber’s father, Marion Barber Jr., played seven seasons with the New York Jets in the 1980s.The younger Barber is fourth on Dallas’ career list for rushing touchdowns with 47 after getting passed in 2021 by two-time NFL rushing champion Ezekiel Elliott. He finished with 53 and never had fewer than four in any of his seven seasons.The former Minnesota player, a fourth-round draft pick by Dallas in 2005, had 24 touchdowns in 2006-07 despite starting just one game those two seasons. Barber’s career high was 14 TDs in 2006, when he rushed for just 654 yards.Barber had a career-high 975 yards rushing and 10 TDs in 2007, when he made his only Pro Bowl. His role and production declined from there, and he had careers lows in carries, yards and touchdowns in his final year in Dallas in 2010.Three years after his career ended, Barber was detained and taken to a hospital for a mental health evaluation. Police in Mansfield, another Dallas suburb, said it wasn’t clear what led to the calls that prompted their response.Barber and his father both played for the Golden Gophers, and the younger Barber is second on the school’s career list with 35 rushing touchdowns.Barber and Laurence Maroney, a first-round pick by New England in 2006, were the first pair of NCAA backs to produce two 1,000-yard seasons in consecutive years on the same team. They did it in 2003-04.AdvertisementBarber’s younger brothers, Dom Barber and Thomas Barber, also played for the Gophers. Dom Barber spent four years as a defensive back with the Houston Texans.

Sports

Chicago Cubs shift Keegan Thompson to a starting role for the ‘foreseeable future’ with rotation hit by injuries

Keegan Thompson’s value to the Chicago Cubs goes beyond labeling his role.He has done everything from spot start to working in multi-inning appearances out of the bullpen. His 2.1 bWAR ranks eighth among big-league pitchers and second overall on the Cubs behind catcher Willson Contreras. AdvertisementThompson’s versatility on the pitching staff is a welcomed development for the Cubs. He is slated to start Thursday’s series opener against the St. Louis Cardinals at Wrigley Field.With left-hander Drew Smyly landing on the 15-day injured list Wednesday with a right oblique strain and left-hander Wade Miley not eligible to return from his left shoulder strain until June 10, the Cubs’ starting pitcher depth has been reduced.AdvertisementThompson will be used in the rotation “for at least the foreseeable future,” pitching coach Tommy Hottovy told the Tribune before Wednesday’s game against the Milwaukee Brewers. Hottovy noted Thompson has handled any role the Cubs have put him in. Three of Thompson’s 11 appearances this season have been starts, owning a 1.93 ERA (three runs in 14 innings).Thompson, 27, is coming off a five-inning start against the White Sox in which he limited them to one run.Chicago Cubs pitcher Keegan Thompson, right, celebrates the win with catcher P.J. Higgins on May 22, 2022, at Wrigley Field. The Cubs defeated the Arizona Diamondbacks 5-4. (Brian Cassella / Chicago Tribune)“He’s been doing great out of the rotation,” Hottovy said. “I’m not going to say he’s going to be in the rotation the rest of the year, and I can’t say he’s going to be in the ’pen all year. His versatility allows us to be creative with his workload.”The Cubs have two off days next week during a five-game road trip, allowing them to shuffle the rotation and skip certain pitchers as needed. One benefit to Thompson sliding into a starting role is the opportunity to work on stuff during bullpen sessions between starts, an opportunity that is limited when focusing on recovery after long relief appearances.Chicago Tribune SportsWeekdaysA daily sports newsletter delivered to your inbox for your morning commute.A focus of this rebuilding season should center on finding out what someone like Thompson does best. He struggled after transitioning from the bullpen last July, posting a 5.51 ERA in six starts and dealt with right shoulder inflammation that cost him time and ultimately ended his season.Perhaps Thompson is more effective as a bullpen weapon and spot starter than a regular in the rotation. He has earned a chance, though, to show he can start. This stretch should help the organization evaluate what role is his ideal long-term fit.Hottovy is optimistic Miley, who will throw a bullpen Thursday, will be ready to rejoin the Cubs as soon as he is eligible. Hottovy expressed more concern about Smyly’s oblique injury, stating it’s hard to speculate how long Smyly will be out.Wednesday was again another busy transaction day for the Cubs.AdvertisementRight-hander Michael Rucker came off the IL while right-hander Manuel Rodríguez was recalled and placed on the 60-day IL with a right elbow strain.Jason Heyward was activated, too, resulting in outfielder Nelson Velázquez being optioned to Triple-A Iowa. Velázquez tallied two hits, both infield singles, in two starts after earning his first big-league call up Monday. Manager David Ross’ message to Velázquez when he informed him of the roster move: Just keep doing what you’re doing.“It was awesome to watch him play,” Ross said. “Just keep working. Trying to build a championship-caliber team here with championship players and I think he can be a big part of that with the way he’s grown.”

Sports

Chicago White Sox have yet to field their preferred lineup as shuffling continues because of injuries

Manager Tony La Russa didn’t have the opportunity to include Luis Robert in the Chicago White Sox lineup last week with the center fielder on the COVID-19 related injured list.The Sox on Tuesday reinstated Robert and he returned to action Wednesday batting fourth as the designated hitter against the Toronto Blue Jays at Rogers Centre.AdvertisementWhile Robert was back, La Russa has had to juggle the top of the lineup this week in the absence of Tim Anderson after the Sox retroactively placed the shortstop on the 10-day injured list Monday with a strained right groin.AdvertisementYasmani Grandal led off Tuesday and AJ Pollock was in the spot Wednesday.Injuries and the unique schedule caused by the lockout are some of the factors managers are considering while figuring the lineup.It’s a topic of discussion, whether one is looking for where a certain player is hitting — for instance Andrew Vaughn batted second Wednesday — or who is in and out of the lineup.La Russa recently said he welcomes the conversations.“What I’ve learned is you hope fans are interested enough to care,” La Russa said last month. “And if they don’t understand or they complain, I would rather them have an opinion then, ‘What? Did they play a doubleheader yesterday? What was the lineup?’ Let them be passionate. Let them ask any questions, I’ll give them my answers, and they can decide, if they were the manager, what they would do.“This is the best sport for first- or second-guessing. You can look at that lineup for the second game (of a doubleheader) and say, ‘Wait a minute, where’s José (Abreu)? Where’s Tim?’ It’s all right out there in front, man. It’s one of the beauties of the game.”Because of injuries, the Sox have not had the chance to feature their projected starting lineup once this season.Yoán Moncada began the season on the injured list with a right oblique strain. The third baseman’s first game was May 9, but the Sox were without Eloy Jiménez at that time. The left fielder last played April 23 when he tore the hamstring tendon behind his right knee, requiring surgery.AdvertisementJiménez is rehabbing with Triple-A Charlotte and was back in the Knights lineup Wednesday after leaving his first game with the team Saturday with right leg soreness.Wednesday marked Robert’s first game since the second game of the May 22 doubleheader against the New York Yankees. He had a .337/.379/.483 slash line with four home runs, 14 RBIs and 14 runs in his last 20 games before the COVID IL stint.“If you have a core that you can run out there, and they have the same kind of responsibility, that adds stability to the way you’re going to approach it,” La Russa said Sunday. “And then you play around with the edges depending on who needs the work or whatever. I think that’s the idea. But every once in a while, you may have a matchup where one guy is 10-for-12 (against the opposing pitcher), and you want to protect Abreu, that guy has to hit fifth or something. But it’s better to have that core. We had that going for a while when we had Robert, he was (batting) second, then he went to third or fourth, and we built around him.“But it’s like that double-edged sword. You get excited about the thought of having Eloy and Robert back, but the other part is the fact that these games count (without them). And we’ve proved we can win without them (both missed significant time in 2021). Each game is critical. Hang in there.”It was a point he echoed after Anderson’s injury Sunday.“The games count,” La Russa said, “we’ll figure out a way.”